Bridges Un-burned

I have been a fighter all of my life. When I was a little kid the one adjective I can remember my Dad using to describe me was "tough." Not always very lady-like... but true non-the-less.

So I grew up fighting everyone and everything. My brother was a main focus. Cats and dogs, we were. Oil and water. But I fought friends AND enemies. Boys AND girls. Then puberty hit and I became a lover. Always had a boyfriend. Usually long-term. I loved to be loved. Who doesn't, really? But the fighting stopped altogether. My heart had a new facet that had been opened and it over-rode the harsh fighter in me. It was still lurking inside though.

Fast forward to the present. When I started into the corporate business world about 4 years ago, my life was in shambles. My marriage was practically over after 14 years of loving & fighting, forgiveness & betrayal, mercy & judgment. I had a successful radio ministry that I had to walk away from. I wrote inspirational & humorous columns for the newspaper on a regular basis. I walked away from being a DJ on radio, which I loved, and pursuing music as a profession which was my passion. I walked away from everything I loved to provide for my very heart, my children. So I came in swinging. Defensive. Hyper-Aggressive. While it wasn't always pretty, godly, or correct... it was successful in business. But I almost burned some bridges down in the process. It is always better to build allies than to make enemies & I hadn't learned that yet.

Three year into my new life, I have learned that in all aspects of life, sometimes the best bridges are the ones left un-burned. Relationships, both in business & personal, need great amounts of patience, tolerance and forgiveness. Sometimes when you think it is too late for a relationship to be salvaged, it somehow turns into exactly what you had hoped for. I have seen it in my friend's marriage. I have seen it in business.

So when that hard relationship seems to be teetering on the brink of total annihilation, I take a step back. I look over that bridge really hard. It may connect me to other things on the other side that I still need and want to have in my life. What's the use in burning it down? I can always just walk away and leave it un-burned. Who knows when it might end up leading to the other side of all this struggle and into a place of new peace? Why shut down the possibilities?

Sometimes the best bridges are those left un-burned.